If you had to insert yourself into this picture which side would you choose? The dessert? The sunshine? The sunshine, flowers, and happiness is where I would choose. If I close my eyes and imagine happiness these things are there. Unfortunately when my eyes are open I do not always feel like I am on the sunshine side. Somedays it feels like I am the only one struggling and everyone else is succeeding and making it look easy. They are enjoying the sunshine. And I want to enjoy the sunshine!
But bads days can feel like the dessert. Thinking that so and so is such a cool mom. Patient, toned legs, “messy” hair, and her kids are eating carrot sticks with smiles. While I am in my “active” wear, with a glowing nose mystery item in my hair, trying to remember if I brushed my teeth, and giving threats through gritted teeth to my kids in the Target checkout. Doesn’t it feel like everyones eyes are on you in your dark moments. And their judgement is radiating off of them. Critiquing your every move. Those days that just are blah. Everyone has them. Some more than others.
But then there is the opposite side. Good days when my kids are being perfection, I am being so patient that even I am impressed, my kids love their healthy snacks, and I have showered. Self-righteousness. Which is just as sad as the dark side of the tree. Because in both situations I have thought about myself and what others are thinking of me. But the great thing is, it does not matter. Even better we have the ability to bring each other into the sunshine. What would happen if on our good days when we feel the sunshine we helped bring someone who isn’t into it? I used to really care about what people thought of me. I didn’t realize it but now I don’t. I’m not sure when that happened. I know I am doing my best and am secure in my decisions. And you can be to. Will everyone agree with your decisions? No. And that is okay. Know you are doing your best.
For some reason we all feel like we need to do it all, or at least look to everyone else like we do it all. Always appearing to everyone that our life is the shiny, green side of the tree, when inside we feel so alone. Listen ladies NO ONE is doing it all. No one can do it all. If someone appears to have it all together in one area, there IS an area lacking somewhere that we don’t see. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others. We all have our gifts. Lets embrace one another for our gifts. Bring each other into the sunshine. To listen, support, and laugh.
Comparison is the thief of joy.